A Quiet Empty

It has been about a week and a half since Tyrone left us. Steve has been gone for a week. At this moment the Center is quite a different place than it was at a certain moment a month ago, two months ago, etc. Kind of silly to think about. Things are different. But is that really that crazy of a thought? Who really expects things to stay the same? Why do we do this? What is it about nostalgia that is so attractive? One would think that freedom and opportunity and possibility would be a bigger draw. Maybe they are. Maybe we move constantly back and forth from what lies behind to what lies ahead. But then, of course, what happens to the present? Does anyone pay attention to now?

For now I am content with the way things are going. Dante has taken on a leadership role in the Center, no one has died (I suppose not that funny, but we have to be able to laugh sometimes) and we have been able to remain on schedule while taking care of all the extra responsibilities that come to us each day. In addition the Center has been quiet because it is the beginning of the month and in general the guys seem to be a little more relaxed than usual.

This morning we read the story in which Jesus heals the paraplegic who was lowered through the roof of the house in which he was teaching. Surrounded by followers and other interested individuals (including the wicked Pharisees) Jesus proclaims that he forgives the man of his sins. This is apparently unaccpetable to the Pharisees because only God can forgive people. Of course this does not bother Jesus. As the Son of Man (read: as a human being), as a son of man he forgives the man because that is what we should to each other. As it says in the Our Father, "forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespassed against us." In the Prayer of St. Francis it says, "it is in forgiving that one is forgiven." I think anyone can see what is going on here. Forgiveness is a reciprocal process. It is something that we do for others and at the same time something that we do for ourselves. In a sense we are all connected (there are many faiths that stress this idea). A theme of The Brothers Karamazov by Dostoevsky is that we are guilty before all and everyone else is guilty before us. Only when we remember our common predicament, that we are all capable of evil, can we come to understand that forgiveness in all situations is the only answer. Because no matter how much we want to admit it we are already guilty too. Forgiveness is what love would do. Forgiveness is the action of love.