Thanksgiving - One Warm Coat

I am not sure when the last time I wrote but it does beel like a short while. I suppose this is because the last week was fairly uneventful. Last weekend we said goodbye to Chris. We had a good time, went out, shared thoughts and feeling, all that good stuff. The goodbye, as usual, was not very dramatic. We walked Chris down to the cab and he got in. It was a bit sad, and it is weird to continually expect one more person at the dinner table, but we are doing well and adjusting.
Thanksgiving was pretty cool. I headed over to the other Oakland house because all of my roommates were gone. I am lucky because if I would have stayed alone I would have probably had Ramen. Instead, I was treated to a traditional meal of turkey and all the other good stuff and some good conversation. I got to see the end of Mean Girls with Lindsey Lohan, which should be made illegal for how it portrays (read scantilly clad) girls too young for guys like me. We also watched Elf, a silly movie with Will Ferrell from the holiday season of last year. Good stuff.
On Friday we participated in the kick-off for One Warm Coat at Bay Street in Emeryville. It was cool, and by that I mean that it got quite chilly - even for Oakland. Now, just because I am from Wisconsin does NOT mean that I like the cold (cold weather - I suppose people could like coldness per se) or that I am used to or can handle cold weather better than other people. NO. I dislike cold weather just as much as other people and maybe that is why I am helping in a drive to collect warm coats for people who need them. I also may be doing this because it is part of my job. It is hard to separate the reasons and the doings sometimes (I don't think that made sense). Anyways, it went well. We collected about 400 coats and I got to hang out with Steve and Sherri and Phil and all the other people who are making this thing happen. Collecting coats for homeless people is just the start and trying to help them into a better life. I am glad to be part of the machine. I guess that is sometimes the best we can do. Jump into something that is good and contribute. All long as it is something good then I can feel good about it. And if it is something good, who cares what it is, at least you are DOING something. Most people are not (I think I can safely say this because if it were not true I do not think we would need homeless shelters or that we would be fighting some bullshit war for oil). Oh know, I just worte down an opinion and now people know what I think. Maybe not the best idea, but this is a blog and I guess it is a proper venue to voice opinions. Anyway, anyone who is reading this is most likely someone who is doing something so I am probably not attacking you. And if you are not doing anything, than I guess I am attacking you. This is not to say that I am great, I am just glad to be here, be part of a machine (a hopfully good one).
Ok, so One Warm Coat was good. I ended up driving 40 bags of coats back to the Center in the van. I could not see anything but made it back. Now I am just relaxing on the holiday weekend. All my family and friends, you are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope you are having a good Thanksgiving weekend.

People

One of the guys that has been here since I have is having a hard time right now. We have worked together and hung out and stuff, but for the last few weeks he has been lost. Steve, Tyrone and I can see him crashing, he is being swallowed by his addiction. It is bothering me right now because he is a good guy and it's bad to see this happening. Also, I feel as though he is becoming a detriment to the Center. I would like to help, we all would, but it is difficult to decide what to do. Usually someone has to hit bottom before they reach out for help. But when does that come? What can you do until then? There aren't any easy answers and we pretty much cannot do anything. Just be here I guess. But I don't like the atmosphere it is creating at the Center, so that is something I think should be addressed. It's a bummer to see this happening.
I had a good experience yesterday when I was at St. Mary's Day Care. When I walked into the room, Dmitri, one of the little 4-year old boys ran up to me and buried himself in my lap. I enjoy working with the kids. They are fun to play with, innocent, silly, nuts, all sorts of good things. One thing that I realized when he came to me was that all he saw was "the guy who comes in on Mondays and reads and plays with us." He did not see the color of my skin or anything of that nautre. The innocence and potential in the kids amazes me. I love seeing it. I hope that they find direction and support so the good things can be nurtured.

Any "A" Day

On Saturday we held our first ever Any "A" Day at the Center. It was inspired by Brian, a volunteer from St. Mary's College who received a heart transplant 10 years ago. With this in mind we themed the Day a celebration of second chances and community. This fits in well with what we are doing at the Center because everyone deserves a second chance and one of the ways to best provide this is through community.
We started the day off with speeches from the many volunteers at the Center. Richard Nivens, who is the head of the committee for the Center, welcomed everyone. I spoke about JVC and my perspective of the Center, followed by the Mission Year guys and then Tyrone. It was good to hear how everybody feels about the Center, especially when it comes from the heart.
After a short break we had a foot washing ceremony, based on the story of Jesus in the bible, led by Lu Cuevas who is the director of the conferences. This was one of the most amazing experiences that I have had since joining JVC and working at the Center. Washing other people's feet helped me get in touch with my humility. I could feel it in the position of supplication that I had to take as a kneeled down before my fellow volunteers and brothers and sisters at the Center. I also realized their humility. It takes a certain amount of intimacy to let someone else kneel before you and wash your feet. This is why both parties involved in the feet washing were able to say thank you. The people getting their feet washed are thankful for the humility that the person kneeling is giving them. I was thankful that the other people in the Center let me humble myself before them, so I could have that experience. It is really a two way street, at least the way I see it.
After another little break we got ready to eat. Paul, from Mission Year, and I led a bread breaking ceremony in which we celebrated our oneness with the world as a community of God and also thanked each other and God for the relationships we have been able to form and the bread that we were able to share together. It was cool and then we feasted on a Thanksgiving dinner of turkery, mashed potatoes and vegetables.
A band palyed for the rest of the day with raps inbetween the sets of songs. The music was great: blues, gospel, jazz all performed by Phil (a client) and his group of family and friends. I even got up and sang Under the Boardwalk. It was awesome to chill with every one and listen to the music. I feel like it brought people together, in the least we were able to relax together.
I had to go home at around 5, but they held an open meeting for people of all the 12 step programs. I do not know how it went, but I am sure that after a day like we had it went well. I am so thankful for the opportunity that I had this last weekend. It really created a sense of fellowship in my mind and I am sure that others felt the same way also. It was great to share this experience with everyone present. I will try and post some pictures from the weekend. As Steve and I often talk about, it is amazing what can happen if you get out of the way and let God do a little work.

Spirituality Night

My anecdote is not going to come from an event related to St. Vincent de Paul But in the spirit of knowing the inner thoughts of a Volunteer at St. Vincent de Paul I think that this story is relevant.
Last night was our spirituality night for our JVC community. I do not know if I have talked about this, but we have an agenda meeting each week, a community night each week and a spirituality night each week. We also try to eat together four nights of the week, although this is not always possible. The community and spirituality nights are hosted by a different member of the community each time we hold them, so there is a diversity of experiences.
For this spirituality night one of the members explained that dancing alone has become a way for her to relax, think and connect with God. She had us all try this form of prayer on our roof in downtown Oakland. We were allowed to think about anything we wanted and perform any movements in which our spirit guided us.
Luckily we have a big roof and there was room to spread out. I found a corner and ackwardly began dancing. The biggest challenge for me was fighting my feelings of self-consciousness and embarrassment. It is not often that you dance alone without any music (and seemingly to outsiders for no good reason). I could not help wondering if my housemates were watching me and judging the way I was dancing. This all begs some questions: Why feel self-conscious about dancing? About doing something spiritual? Why be afraid of being judged for something so unimportant as dancing on the roof? What led me to feel this way? How can I fight it?
I could probably go on forever. The easy answer is that there is nothing to feel self-conscious about when dancing, or praying, or doing anything worthwhile for that matter. I suppose I was afraid because we were doing something new and because it is not always accepted to do something out of the ordinary.
While I was doing my little dance I found that my movements went in cycles. As I battled in wardly there was a direct physical manifestation of my thoughts. So when I thought about others watching me and judging me my movements were erractic and more fast paced. I could almost feel demons trying to work themselves out. When I calmed my thoughts my movements were much calmer. For example, I spent a little time picturing Jesus at the Wedding of Cana. I could see Him dancing with friends, performing a dance from the time (what exactly I do not know). And I specifically remember putting a smile on His face, which is most doubtedly how it would have been. It was a wonderful thought: Jesus having fun with His friends, dancing, having food and drink; a relaxing and human moment for a Savior. Anyways, when I came out of the daydream with a smile on my face and my movements mimicked those I saw in the dream.
To me this was a true prayer. I was able to connect with my God in a way that influenced not only my mind but also my physical body. What an experience! As I think back I would love to get back to that spot where I can feel the calm, where I can experience the love that was present in the individual that provided the ultimate model of love itself. I will pray like this in the future in any way possible so that I can infuse the experience of God into every day life.

Theology on Tap

Could there be a better mix of two things that are so great in life? Tonight I went with Katie and Emily and a former JV to Theology on Tap out in a Peidmont bar. The topic of discussion was cloning and stem cell research "in a brave new world." The lecture was mostly scientific with a few touches on the ethical debate, especially from the Catholic point of view. I enjoyed it although I wish we could have spent more time debating the different philosophical and ethical points of view. I did learn that everyone, even the Catholic church, believes stem cells are good (for medical treatments) as long as the stem cells used are adult stem cells.
The weekend visit from St. Mary's went well. The students came to our house around 5:30 and provided a tasty Chinese meal. We hung out for a while and then watched a movie about a homeless man trying to lead "the good life," fittingly named Socrates (played by Laurence Fishbourne). It was a good movie. Any time we (as white, educated, suburban, well-off kids) can gain perspective on other people who live different experiences is a good thing.
On Sunday I sung at Our Lady of Lourdes for the first time in their music ministry program. It was good to get back into a little singing. Which reminds me that on Saturday I went to the home of a client and sang with he and his band (or the group of singers that he gets together with). It was great. Not only does he have a good voice, but it was cool to be welcomed into his home and spend some time (singing and chilling) with his relatives and friends. Overall, it was nice to be so warmly welcomed. I will be singing a song with them (Under the Boardwalk) on Saturday for "Any 'A' Day" that we are holding at the Center. I am excited to have everyone down at the Center and perform again.
This week is going well so far. The Center is still rolling, we made another pick-up for One Warm Coat, Wednesday I meet with Justin (one or our support people) and Thursday is meeting to review Homeless Court (which we are preparing clients for the next round of dismissals). So things are cool, I am just glad to be here.

Weekend

I feel as though we got a lot done this week. November has been busy up to this point and it is only going to get crazier. But we are doing well. We made our first pick-up for One Warm Coat at the American Red Cross. They already collected 102 coats and will be giving us more. I have to say that this makes me happy. We delivered the coats out to the Community Occupational Health Project in Fruitvale. God knows that they need them. So it feels good to have done something concrete with the project.
On Friday I attended a meeting in which we discussed winter housing for some of the guys. We have been allotted 5 beds out at the army base to give to the men for a 2 month period during the winter months. The program starts this Monday and runs through April. It will be cool to get some of the guys a warm place to sleep once it gets cold.
We also had a committee meeting on Friday. It went smoothly, I got to talk about One Warm Coat and it seems as though we are heading in the right direction at the Men's Center. It is pretty cool to sit down with some of the guys that are high up at St. Vincent de Paul. I feel as though I am doing something (a little different feeling from the one I get when I am helping out one of the guys - neither are better than the other).
Tonight we are hosting a bunch of students (13) from St. Mary's College. They are doing some sort of urban immersion program, or so I think, then eating with us, watching a movie, discussing and going to bed. It will be good to hang out with the group of kids. There will also be some Lasallian Volunteers coming. It reminds me of my Appalachia volunteer trips at BC. Twenty kids in sleeping bags on the floor after a hard day of work. We will see how it goes.

Good news

After being disappointed with the news from Madison, I am more than excited to say that I have been accepted to Medical College of Wisconsin. The acceptance of the acceptance and the money to hold my spot in the class are already in the mail. Seeing as I have spent the last 4 years of my life (at least) working towards this goal it is fair to say that a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I am ecstatic.
Now, this does not seem as though it relates to the Center or anything else, but maybe it does. In fact, I suppose it seems to relate to everything. How? I do not know. I have been in a great mood since hearing the news. When I help a guy in the Center it makes me think of what I will be doing for the next 50 years of my life (hopefully). That is, serving people. Maybe I even have preemptive doctor powers. Probably not, but I can test that out on my roommates.
The day at the Center was status quo. Did not do much out of the ordinary. I did try and help a newly homeless couple find a place to stay for the evening. I gave them some information on transitional and longer term housing, which hopefully they will look into, but finding a place for the night was the highest priority.
I would like to mention just one more thing today. We have been playing a great ball game in our house (non-destructive of course) with a certain stuffed pumpkin and a highly modified tubular couch pillow. I cannot get into all of the rules but would like to mention that it is a great game that builds community and keeps us up later than we should be. I would also like to say that I completely dominated Justin Looser, my roommate, last night and that he should not feel bad about it. Things like this happen to all of us at some point. Well, at least some of you. Anyways, all kidding aside I believe all people should develop some sort of indoor game to be played, especially in the cooler months and if you have kids.

JVC loss

At the moment I cannot remember everything that has happened in the last few days, but I will try my best to figure things out. On Sunday when we got back from Napa I found out that I was wait-listed at the Wisconsin Medical School. A lot of people have told me this is a good thing because I was not rejected, but I would really have liked to be accepted just to give me a peace of mind during this process. I find out about MCW this week and I feel optimistic about my chances there. Needless to say I was a little bummed about the whole situation. My roommates were cool and luckily things are rolling at the Center with the guys, so I can find a little diversion and happiness there.
On Monday instead or working in the Dining Room I went with Rebecca (who hired me) to San Francisco to work at a career fair. We represented St. Vincent de Paul and YNPN, which is a membership organization for those who are new to the non-profit sector in general or new to the non-profit sector in the Bay Area. YNPN provides networking events and workshop events throughout the year and also has a job list on its website along with discussion forum. These are the main services, which help people get connected in non-profit and become better at what they do. I relayed this information to a million people about a million times.
Monday night, Julien (our Area Director for JVC) came over for his area visit. We had a nice dinner and dessert and also a community discussion session. Unfortunately we had to discuss Chris' decision to leave the community. This came in light of a tragic event in his family so it was not an easy night. Basically Chris is not happy in the program and is unable continue. We are all upset that he is leaving because he is such a likable guy, but we are supportive in his decision and want everything to work out for the best. This will definitely change the way things work within our community, but we are up to the task.
Besides that, I am thankful for where I am right now and am excited for the opportunities that have been presenting themselves. Life seems to be striking a balance when I weigh my personal life, the Center, the community, life goals, etc. I feel as though all these different aspects of the day offer perspective on the grander scale of life, something about which I would like to continue to learn.

Concert, Napa

I am trying to think what the work week was like, but it is not coming very well. I suppose that means that everything went as normal, a pretty plain week working with the guys. Things are moving ahead with One Warm Coat and besides that just a lot of odd jobs.
I had the wonderful opportunity of attending a benefit concert (for Sr. Marion and the Women's Visitation Center) on Friday night out in Piedmont. I went with my roommate Carol, Steve, Tyrone and his date Kathy. We listened to a band that played a lot of original christian music in many different styles. I enjoyed the gospel, soulful music and the best part of performance was that we got to sing along with quite a few of the pieces. Seeing as I enjoy singing, this was right up my alley. It was good to spend the night with my co-workers and roommate just chilling.
On Saturday we went up to Napa to do a little wine tasting tour. It was a great trip, beautiful scenery. I am not saying anything new here. The first place we stopped was Viansa, a newer little winery that does not distribute its wines. I think that it brought us all into the Napa spirit. Another highlight of the trip was visiting Franics Ford Coppolla's winery. What a magnificent place! I felt as though I were in a caste, there were fountains outside, and the hills with the grapes growing in rows were a sight to see. It was nice to get away from the city for a bit, although at times I found myself feeling a little guilty being in such a beautiful, wealthy area while the guys are sleeping under the bridge. I guess I should be thankful for what I have and use my gifts to compliment those of others.

Apology

I would like to start off this blog with an apology to all those who read the last one, all two of you. I titled the post, "Busy Bee" and for that I am truly sorry. I got in late last night from my interview in New York. My bed never felt so good. Today was like any other day, and for that I am thankful. As Steve likes to say, "I thank God for exactly where I am right now." I suppose this can be taken in any number of ways. Our physical position, our mental state of mind, an experience we just had or are having, etc. It was good to get back into the swing of things after being away from the Center for a few days.
Tonight I had my first choir practice for the church that my community attends. I sang in an a cappella group in college and since leaving have missed being able to regulary sing. Although this is a little bit different, I am glad to have this new outlet. It also brings a little more structure to my week and holds me in a position in which I feel I can better challenge and grow in my spirituality. The priest at the last mass said that when we sing we are praying twice. I don't know if God made that rule or we did, I am just glad to be singing again.

Busy Bee

I am sorry that I have not kept up too well lately, but I think I do have a good excuse. I went home to Wisconsin this weekend for an interview at Medical College of Wisconsin. It went well, I hear whether or not I was accepted within the next two weeks. It was really nice to see my family. We went out for dinner and I got a brat. For anyone who does not know what that is, it is a kind of sausage that we eat in Wisconsin. It's a German thing, very good. Anyways, it is always good to get home, be with my family and do and eat things that are homey.
I am back now, but leave again tomorrow for an interview in New York. The trip is going to be crazy, very hectic. But this is the way things are. Today's work was good, I worked in the dining room with John who is a former nuclear engineer. He went to graduate school at Notre Dame so we exchanged our dislike for one another before we decided to be friends. It was good to hear his stories. John worked on the atomic bomb after he got out of school, not because he wanted to but because the Navy did. Then he did more peaceful and useful things with his knowledge, working on nuclear power in the states. Good stuff. We must of emptied about a million little packets of croutons into buckets. More to come.